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Immediately following a breakup the avoidant often feels a sense of relief but not because they didn’t care. Yes, if you dated for a period of time they will miss you and think of you occasionally but often not in the way you wish they would. What they feel relief from is the dysregulation associated with parts of the relationship. They associate that feeling with this must not be the relationship for me because it should be easy. There is also often a push from the anxious Attacher for clarity
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